Perfect line for me today. I wish I could start everything all over again. I know I should be thankful for what I am right now, because if it wasn't for my past, I wouldn't be this strong and happy, but you know, there are times when you just wish that if you had a chance to start over again, do everything right, you would.
I wish I could start the thing with my school all over again. I messed it up once when I left for Canada, I messed it up again when I left for Vancouver and didn't take the pre-requisite subjects needed for my post-secondary education, and now, I'm afraid that I might mess it up again. They say mistakes makes you learn and makes you stronger, but in this case, it only made me scared. Scared that I might not pull it off. I might not be in the course that I want.
I'm now in a state of confusion. Confused about life, confused about post-secondary education. I'm so scared of failing. So scared of not pulling it off even though people actually says I could. I feel that I'm not a smarty-pants and I suck at every subject that I'm taking. I'm too pressured to do the best and to ace that high score. I feel like I'm in a deep shit right now.
I wish this could be over, I wish that I won't feel any pressure right now. I wish I can actually do this one right and not fail. I might lose it if I did fail. I might have a nervous breakdown. Sigh!