Time for my birthday wish list to be posted.

 

This Chanel Flats. This is too cute, it carries one hefty price tag though.

This cute camera bag which I found at photojojo for $149.

 

Fuji Instax 20 : $140 @ photojojo.

 

Strobe light for $40 @ Don's photo.

 

Reflectos @ Don's photo for $29?

 

and a new tripod, since my tripod is already broken and I need this for my self portrait photoshoot. :)

I have a lame wish list this year, everything is all about camera's. I just can't think of anything that I want. I guess I'm already contented with what I have. Maybe my super wish this year would be TO LOSE WEIGHT! Lulz. I've been constantly saying on how I'd stop eating a lot but it seems that I can't. I told the lover that I'll be going to the gym. Hope I won't be lazy.

 

NEW POLISHED NAILS! <3

A bad relationship can make you better for the next. Learn from it and become better, not bitter

Happy Halloween Everyone!
Because I'm feeling vain, and I'm not in the mood to prepare any kind of costume, I put face mask on.
I bought it earlier and I'm trying if it's good on the face.
It has avocado extract and oatmeal. :)
Now it's time to do the nails. :)

 

I wanna go on a vacation ASAP

 

I wish I could have my own house in the Philippines, maybe in Tagaytay or Baguio or somewhere near the beach to be exact. I'd love love to put this chair/swing on my house. It looks so cute.

 

BECAUSE I'M BORED LIKE THAT!

I'm planning to join a photo contest, though I'm positive that I won't win it, I'm still gonna try. I need to have time to figure out what to send, and time to have a photo walk alone. Though this would be hard because the weather is so cold and I hate cold weather, I'm still gonna find time to do it. Wish me luck.

I don't have everything but I have enough.

I haven't think of any birthday wish list to put up. Ahhhhhhhhhh. I guess I have everything that I ever wanted, and I'm contented with it. Hmmmm. I'm gonna start thinking tomorrow of what I want for my birthday! :)

Just chillin with cucumber face mask on. YAY! I need some heavy massage! :)

Sometimes I just want to let go. Let go of all the pain, let go because I felt this is too hard and I just can't take it anymore, but everytime I think of how long I've hold on it just keeps on pulling me back. I wish I have the strength to let go. Let go of the pain, let go of everything that hurts me. I wish I was that strong to not care and not give a damn. I wish I wasn't too scared, too scared that maybe I won't have the chance to feel like this again despite of the pain that I'm feeling.

Current song playing....current song which describes what I feel.

“The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved - loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves.”

—	~ Victor Hugo

“Someone once told me that the power in all relationships lies with whoever cares less. And he was right. But power isn’t happiness … happiness comes from caring more about people—rather than less.”

—	Ghost of Girlfriends Past

It's almost my birthday. a month and 16 days from now, I'd be turning 20. Which sounds exciting. Goodbye teen and I'm gonna embrace adulthood.

For the past 4 years I've learned so much about life. The moment I stepped into college, I've come to realizations that life sometimes is a bitch and you just have to deal with it. Nothing in this world is easy. You have to suck it up and try to find your way out when you're in a tight situation. I've met new people which some of them became my friends. Friends who stick with me through thick and thin, and whom I consider as my family. I've learned a lot of things. I've been through a lot of things.

My favorite quotation about life would be "I've been there, done that". I've experienced and done many things normal teenager would do. I've done smoking, drinking, and the like. I've partied my heart out. Cried my heart out and laugh my heart out. I failed, I succeed and etc. But I guess it's still ain't enough. I still have a long way to go. I still have more matured experiences and more tougher challenges to face.

Being 20, marks the beginning of facing real world challenges. I have to be able to handle those tougher challenges because I'm matured enough and I know I can do it. There's no more time for drama, I have to stop being a drama queen. I have to hold myself together, and do whatever it takes to succeed. Many people expect something big from me, and I won't fail them. Never.

“A friend is someone who, upon seeing another friend in immense pain, would rather be the one experiencing the pain than to have to watch their friend suffer.”

Excerpted from a comment that I left in last weekend’s discussion on Jezebel about Fucking While Feminist:
The whole “they complete me” idea we have of relationships totally disregards the fact that for some people, long-term monogamous partnerships are just not fulfilling. Some people don’t need romantic love in their life whereas others might want more than one romantic partner, yet all of us get sold the exact same idea: there’s one special person out there who we should be waiting, looking, and striving for. And this is a message given to EVERYBODY — regardless of gender or sexuality.
But what about people who are asexual? People who might have totally great friendships but don’t prioritize romance for whatever reason? People who don’t want to do cohabitation and would prefer to live alone for the rest of their lives? Not choosing love or sex or The One is perhaps the biggest societal taboo, even more scandalous than sleeping around or marrying and divorcing indiscriminately. (At least those things indicate that one is pursuing companionship, be it sexual or romantic.)
If one opts out of all love/sex or doesn’t aspire to be one part of a unit, one automatically becomes known as a crazy person. And while this stereotype is more true for straight women (e.g. unwanted spinsters) than men of any orientation (e.g. swinging bachelors), I definitely think that the both groups are subject to pressure to couple up.

And P.S. is it any surprise that so many marriages end in divorce when the expectations that we have for our spouses are incredibly high and often

 

First fall of snow this 2010. 

I love the snow. The only thing I hate is the wind chill. 

I was about to click that confirm button for the online orders I made, but I didn't. Can't decide if I should buy it now or later? The lover told me that I overbuy things that I don't need and won't use which is true. Hmmm. I should stop spending too much and save.

I'm planning a cruise trip to Europe. I saw this itinerary at NCL which only cost less than a thousand bucks, which is not bad for a cruise to Europe right? I haven't been to Europe. I'm gonna ask my dad where are the nicest place there. Obviously the ones that cost too much would be way nicer than the ones which is cheaper. But maybe just maybe there's a great deal which is cheaper and at the same time nicer. I wanna wanna go cruise so bad. Spend some time alone and unwind. Maybe a birthday gift for myself next year?

I'm planning to spend my birthday this December at Edmonton. I badly want to go shopping there. Hope the parents would allow me. I'm 20 now. Goodbye teenager, hello adulthood! :)

We all want to grow up. We're desperate to get there. Grab all the opportunities we can to live. We're so busy trying to get out of that mess, we don't think about the fact that it's going to be cold out there. Really freaking cold. Because growing up sometimes means leaving people behind. And by the time we stand on our own two feet, we're standing there alone.

My Mother bought me a bag of carrots from walmart. She told me to chug only the carrots and don't eat any other food so I would lose weight. My Mom's so sweet. :)

It's snowing now. I can feel the winter season soon coming. I need to prep up those winter clothes and shoes. Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow :)

I guess I'll have to endure the pain so I will get used to feeling the pain and would be numb. 


I wish I was that brave to say what I really feel, and stand up for what I believe in. 


Sometimes I wish that I could just ignore everything.

How do you know when enough is enough?

It's been a long day today and I need to sleep early. I'll be working early in the morning tomorrow. I love morning shifts, time goes by so fast. Goodnight ya'll!

Just finished fixing my room and closet. Finally, I've sorted out those clothes that I don't wear anymore. It made me realize that I have so much clothes and I need to stop shopping. Some of the clothes I have are the ones I used to wear when I was slim. I wish I can wear those again. 

So I started eating carrots with ceaser salad dressing. I'm liking the taste of it. I'm planning to go to superstore or walmart tomorrow to buy some more, and buy the ranch dressing, the ceasar dressing is kinda sour but that will do.

I wish I'd lose weight soon. I'll try to eat carrots for a month and see how it goes. I hope I can control myself from eating other fatty foods. I can't gain anymore weight. I'm already depressed with the weight that I have right now.

My closet's a mess. In a few minutes I'll be logging out from this computer and start cleaning and fixing it. I need to keep those clothes that I won't be using anymore. Kbye, I'll be posting later.

 

I miss having my own room. 

 

Wanttt! Though instead of superman I would love to put Mickey Mouse.

Don't be afraid or ashamed of who you are. You don't have to change for anybody. They're the ones that need to change.

Picture of my cousin's dog. Binoo!

 

Because I'm bored like that!

HCO is love.

Ahhhhh! I hate it when I had a whole day off then suddenly I need to go to work early the other day. I wish I wouldn't have to work anymore. It's so stressing. I mean school and work? Thank God next week would be an easy week for me. I have 4 days off. Yayyyy! 

It's getting cold already. I can feel the winter air coming. I need to go winter clothes shopping soon. But I need to lose weight first. I've always been talking and posting blogs on how I wanted to lose weight, but it looks like it'll take me forever to chug of those fats. Lulz. I ate to much today, I seriously need to control my eating habits. Like seriously. I don't want to gain another 5 more pounds. 

It makes me depress seeing my fat body and being not able to wear the clothes that I want.
Seeing my flabby arms and thunder thighs makes me sad. How I wish I didn't eat too much. I need to get that 130lbs. body back.

The bottom line is, life is about learning, whether you’re in school or not. We are human. We make mistakes. But your lowest moment might also be the one where you begin to rise, and rise. So double back. Regroup. Brush yourself off, and try again.

You don’t know what goes on in anyone’s life but your own. And when you mess with one part of a person’s life, you’re not messing with just that part. Unfortunately, you can’t be that precise and selective. When you mess with one part of a person’s life, you’re messing with their entire life. Everything… affects everything.

Jay Asher, Thirteen Reasons Why

  

Lauren Conrad <3

 

An Oxford is a style of laced shoe characterized by shoelace eyelet tabs that are stitched underneath the vamp, a construction method that is also sometimes referred to as "closed lacing". Oxfords first appeared in Scotland and Ireland, where they are occasionally called Balmorals. Oxfords are traditionally constructed of leather and were historically plain, formal shoes but are now available in a range of styles and materials that complement both casual and formal forms of dress.

 

Men's quarter brogue oxford shoes

Oxfords, characterized by shoelace eyelet tabs that are stitched underneath the vamp contrast with Derbys, characterized by shoelace eyelet tabs that are sown on top of the vamp.

Men's full brogue (or wingtip) oxford spectator shoes

The meanings of the terms Oxford and Balmoral vary geographically; in the U.S., "Balmoral" is synonymous with "Oxford", while "Oxford" is often used to refer to any "dressy" style of shoe, including the Blücher (Derby); elsewhere, especially in Britain, the Balmoral is a particular type of Oxford where there are no seams (apart from the toe cap) descending to the welt, a style particularly common on boots.

Oxfords can be made from a variety of materials including leather, patent leather and canvas based on considerations of function or fashion. These are commonly black or brown, and may be plain or ornately styled Brogues.